Things to avoid during your waiting season
- Lay Jordan
- Apr 7
- 7 min read
Episode No. 36
Where to listen:
Remember that viral trend "Things I'm embarrassed to admit at [age]"? For the longest time, I couldn't bring myself to participate. Even though so many people were sharing their stories, I felt overwhelmed by my own struggles, making it feel impossible to voice what I was going through.
Now, at 23, I can finally open up about what was once my biggest source of shame: being unemployed for over a year. It wasn't just about not having a job - it was the fear of being labeled as lazy when I was giving it my absolute all. Every rejection email (or worse, the deafening silence) hit harder because I had done everything "right" - earned my degree, built a strong portfolio, completed internships, and polished my LinkedIn profile. The one area I struggled with most was networking and maintaining professional connections - something I'm still working to improve.
Looking back, that year threw everything at me: the job search struggles, unexpected health challenges, the end of a significant relationship, and a period of isolation that probably crossed into depression territory. But here's the thing - that waiting season, as difficult as it was, became my greatest teacher. It's why I stepped into 2025 stronger than ever.
I've already shared some positive strategies for navigating your waiting season in the podcast episode above. Take a listen first, then come back as we explore what not to do.
The Don't List
Avoiding or Criticizing Your Experience
After my contract role ended, I focused on managing health issues while creating content and exploring career options. However, burnout eventually set in, leaving me feeling trapped in a cycle of stagnation. Despite taking time to recover and draft a five-year plan, my job search efforts were hampered by limited networking. As family responsibilities took center stage, I found myself sidestepping important questions about my career direction and losing sight of my professional aspirations.
The pressure mounted as I watched peers progress in their careers through LinkedIn updates and social media posts about job offers and promotions. Each passing day without visible progress felt like falling behind, feeding a cycle of self-doubt. I constantly questioned my choices, career path, and abilities, letting self-criticism become my default mindset. Breaking free from this negative spiral is crucial during a waiting season - it clouds your judgment, prevents you from seeing opportunities, and drains the energy you need for genuine growth. Most importantly, this constant self-criticism can turn what should be a period of reflection and preparation into a time of self-punishment and stagnation.
Key Lesson: Your challenges are valid, and they deserve to be acknowledged with compassion, not criticism. This isn't about ignoring or obsessing - it's about finding that middle ground where growth can happen.
Falling Into the Doom Scrolling Trap
While I never fully succumbed to bed rotting - I'd always be working on blog posts, editing, or reading - I did find myself doom scrolling frequently. 2024 being an election year amplified my anxiety about both the state of the world and my personal situation, especially without job security. I felt caught in this internal conflict - guilty for worrying about my own problems when there were bigger issues in the world, yet constantly comparing myself to peers who were landing jobs in their field, starting new relationships, getting engaged, or finding success in content creation. I kept wondering "When will it be my turn?" and "What am I doing wrong?" These thoughts were coupled with more guilt - maybe things weren't improving because I was being selfish focusing on my own struggles. Though I typically come across as positive, maintaining that mindset requires constant effort.
Key Lesson: Remember that social media is a highlight reel, not reality. Your journey is uniquely yours, and comparing it to others' carefully curated posts only steals your peace.
Turning to Quick Fixes
During tough times, it's tempting to seek comfort in things that give us quick relief. Whether it's emotional eating, excessive shopping, or any other form of escape, these temporary solutions often leave us feeling worse in the long run.
Key Lesson: Identify your potential triggers and coping mechanisms early. Build healthy alternatives that actually nurture your well-being rather than mask the pain.
Isolating Yourself Completely
This one hits close to home. Being an introvert who struggles with social interaction, I found myself retreating further into my comfort zone during tough times. The hardest part was the guilt - I didn't want to burden others with my problems or force myself to maintain social pleasantries when I wasn't in the right headspace. So I stayed home. Yes, I remained productive - working on creative projects, exercising, and maintaining basic routines - but weeks would pass without meaningful human connection. It took small steps, like solo walks to the park or beach, to gradually rebuild my comfort with being around others.
Key Lesson: While it's okay to need alone time, complete isolation can worsen your situation. Start with small, manageable steps to maintain some level of social connection.
Treating Life Like a Never-Ending To-Do List
During my waiting season, I became hyper-fixated on "fixing" my life. Every day became a marathon of self-improvement tasks, networking attempts, and skill-building exercises. When our lives don't align with our vision, it's tempting to go into full Type A mode - creating endless lists of people to contact, appointments to make, and skills to develop.
While personal growth is important, I had to learn that constantly trying to "fix" yourself can be exhausting and counterproductive. We often get so caught up in improving what we see as problems that we neglect basic self-care and forget to make room for joy. I realized that life isn't meant to feel like you're broken all the time - you deserve both growth and enjoyment, proper self-care, and moments of fun. Remember: you're not just a problem to be fixed, you're a person to be nurtured.
Key Lesson: You're not a problem to be solved - you're a person who deserves balance. Make room for joy and rest alongside your growth efforts.
Setting Unrealistic Daily Goals
I found myself constantly overloading my daily schedule, only to feel discouraged when I couldn't complete everything. It's easy to get caught up comparing yourself to others' productivity without realizing that everyone has different circumstances, resources, and support systems that enable their progress. What matters most is identifying what's truly manageable for you and focusing on consistent, sustainable progress at your own pace.
Key Lesson: Progress isn't measured by how many tasks you complete in a day. Set realistic goals that honor your current capacity and celebrate small wins along the way.
Embracing the Journey: Finding Strength in Waiting Seasons
Waiting seasons, while challenging, are not meant to break us but to build us. They're the invisible bridges between who we are and who we're becoming. Whether you're navigating career transitions, personal setbacks, or life's unexpected turns, remember that these periods of uncertainty carry profound purpose. By avoiding these common pitfalls and approaching your waiting season with intention and self-compassion, you can transform what feels like stagnation into a foundation for future growth. Your story isn't on pause - it's actively being written, even in the waiting.
The key is not to rush through these seasons but to embrace them as opportunities for deeper self-discovery and preparation. When you look back, you'll likely find that these periods of waiting weren't just about reaching your destination - they were about becoming the person strong enough to handle what awaits you there.
What Inspired this Episode:
The inspiration behind this episode stems from a profound personal journey through unemployment, faith challenges, and self-discovery. During a transformative church service with my mother and insights gained from the "Just Glow With It" podcast, I found clarity in understanding the concept of waiting seasons. These experiences highlighted the universal struggle of feeling stuck, managing uncertainty, and maintaining faith during challenging times. The episode explores key themes including career transitions, personal development, spiritual growth, emotional resilience, and strategic patience. For those searching for guidance during their own waiting season, this content offers practical advice, emotional support, and spiritual insights to navigate through periods of uncertainty while maintaining hope and purpose.
Episode Description:
Uncertainty happens when you are waiting for your next chapter. The anticipation grows, your patience wears thin and all you are looking for is a sign you'll get out of the situation you feel stuck in. This episode is to share tips on things to do while waiting. Whether the setback is recent or you've been in the sea of uncertainty for months or years, the podcast is designed with a personal list to help you stay afloat. Stay tuned for more episodes.
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Section | Timestamp | Notes |
Introduction | 00:00 | -when you look up waiting season it is heavily religious but it also connects heavily to what I've been focusing on (faith) -blog post about my past struggle of Faith -The inspo: listening to church service with mom, the Just Glow With It podcast |
What is a waiting season | 05:06 | -Time of uncertainty/ feeling stuck -Happens when you need to be patient after taking aligned action -Your character is challenged -There is no specific time frame -There are benefits to being in this season |
Inspo for what you can do during your waiting season | 08:45 | -Identify the type of setback
-Expressing gratitude
- Develop your Hobbies, Skills and Self-educate
-Document the Journey
- Practicing radical honesty with ourselves
-Getting resourceful
|
Card Pull | 19:40 | -Animal Spirit Deck -The Lamb |
What I'm grateful for | 21:40 | -What I experienced for my 23rd birthday and all of October 2024 |
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