Hey guys.
It’s Lay!
I’m going to be super busy this weekend because one of my best friends is having a graduation party. It’s going to be really fun since it gives me a chance to see most of my besties and get out the city for a more rural setting. I grew up in a really urban area for most of my life but when I was younger we always went to our summer home in Georgia. Since I used to have a fear of planes, we always took the train which was a long trip but in a way relaxing. It gave me time to catch up on sleep and when I would wake up, I would stare out the window while listening music and just spend time thinking .
Lately I’ve been doing a lot of reflection and self check in because it’s towards the end of July. I decided to start focusing on my physical health at the end of May. I thought it would be fun to write about my experience in my journey so far. I am going to break it down into sections from recapping the beginning of this journey to things I learned on starting to changes I'm going to make.
The start of it all... (sorta)
Honestly I tried this fitness journey most summers. I started summer 2017 but of course because of my mental state, it was very ineffective. I would just get discouraged by the lack of progress and on top of that I was more worried but other people than myself. Summer 2018 was way more successful because I felt more of a bigger motivation to change. By the end of summer 2018, I looked good, felt great but the motive behind the change wasn't good so the change didn't stick because I went down an emotional spiral.
This year was different because the motivation behind it wasn’t because of another person. It was more about I was tired of feeling the way I did about myself and I wanted to just keep moving forward without feeling dragged down by my emotions and other people. This year I decided to prioritize self care and made sure that exercise was a huge part of that. Self care means ensuring that you are well all around, not just one aspect.
At the end of May, I saw an advertisement on snapchat about planet fitness. I started going because the teen summer challenge which I talked about many times before. I am happy that are doing it because when I was a kid I spent so much time not doing anything to benefit myself and the main reason was things were so expensive. By making it free it gives kids an opportunity to get out the house and do something really beneficial. In past years I tried going to the gyms too and it cost a lot of money but I just wasn't motivated to go. This time was a different experience because I have a support system with me and I felt like that was a huge part of me continuing what I started .
How I am in the present
I feel the most comfortable with myself now than I have in a long time because for the longest time I had self esteem issues. I still have many insecurities but I’m working on myself little by little to presume my happiness. I remember not being able to take pictures of myself and not being able to find even one thing I liked about myself. This process has helped me change my outlook on the world.
My main problem is that sometimes I slip up. Sometimes I eat things that I know is so bad for me. Sometime I over exhaust myself. Sometimes I don't eat when I'm overthinking. Sometimes I eat too much because I am emotional or bored. Breaking old habits is hard and takes a lot of time because if you don't push yourself to change you won't but if you push too hard, you relapse into bad habits.
I’m taking everyday one step at a time but overall I grew more happy with how I look, more strong, more healthy and absolutely built more tolerance and stamina for physical activities. Even with my slip ups every now and then, deep down I know I'm better off.
Top things I learned during the process
I thought this would be good to add because a lot of people struggle through the process of their fitness journey.
1. The first time you go to the gym it will be scary
You would feel self conscious but in reality everyone is so worried about their own goals. People seem to forget even when the actions and goals are different, the big idea is exactly the same: Change. People are going to the gym to change their lifestyle, change to become stronger, change to become happier with themselves, change to achieve a goal etc. People are going to be too preoccupied with themselves and their goals to be worried about what you're doing.
2. Gaining weight isn't always bad
People assume when you gain weight after working and changing your diet instead of losing weight means you aren't doing enough. When a person feel like that it pushes them to extreme measures to a point where it become unhealthy and even dangerous. However there is more to weight then people realize. Sometimes you can be storing a lot of water weight which is completely temporary. Also, you can always lose fat and gain muscle which will cause you to weigh more . Weight gain doesn't mean you are unhealthy and some people need it in order to be healthy.
3. Going with others makes it easier
This goes back to the first thing. Personally my friend was scared her first time going but having friends with her made her more comfortable to the idea. On the other hand with me, it was more like the idea of going to the gym makes it more pleasant. I had previous gyms and I never went because I would be going alone. Overall, you’ll have people to encourage you to do better by yourself.
4. Going to the gym isn't just for your physical health but for your mental health as well
I mentioned before that health is connected one way or another. When you feel good about your appearances it makes it easier to have good thoughts about how you look and grows your confidence. When you believe you can achieve your goals in terms of physical health, you are more likely to do that.
5. What works for someone won't always work for you
There are many factors when it comes to finding a workout and diet that works for you. Your metabolism could be slower or faster than theirs, certain foods may affect your body differently (e.g. for some people the feel sick from dairy while others need it for calcium), where you store fat can be different from them etc. This has to do with the fact there are different body types.
Changes I want to make going forward
Based on what I've been doing so far within my diet, I been thinking about what I want to work on next to make this more progress more effective. My two biggest concerns is I want to work is my diet and sleep patterns. My problem is sometimes I don’t eat enough and sometime when I do eat enough, the food isn't as nutritious as it could be. Also my sleep pattern is really bad and I don't get more than 4-5 hours per day.
Both of those issues combined lead to me constantly feeling exhausted and weak which affects the success of my workout. If I can change those two things I know I will be able to become even more happy with myself because I will not only be able to have an efficient work out but be be able to function as a human being in general
That's all for today and I just want to apologize for this blog being so late. Last week I was so busy cleaning and planning for this weekend writing this blog just completely flew past my head. I started early enough in the week but had such a severe case of writer's block and so little time I only finished the blog Friday before I went. I felt like there was so many things I needed to edit and that I didn't like the format and that there was only so much I can fix on phone. I didn't have my laptop so I had to wait until I was home at 7. I took a shower, made a small dinner and fixed a lot of things in my writing. I never want to just upload anything because I want the quality of my post to my version of perfect.
Anyways I hope you enjoyed this blog and learned something new to share with your friends and family. Be sure to check out old post and subscribe to be able to know when new blogs are up.
Until next time,
xoxo Lay 💋